I went to my to finish my clearance in my first job and gave a mouthful to the HR. I stayed for the night in her apartment, while she goes to work that evening. I hardly slept that night.

She came home that morning, with a modest breakfast, two packs of pancit canton and bread rolls. I remember seeing how happy she was, I still have a mental image of her smiling.

When I told her that I had to leave, she got terribly sad, genuinely sad with tears in her eyes. She wanted to share a meal with me. I then knew that she loved me. Perhaps, I realized that I loved her too, for I stayed longer than I should.

Sometimes, we take for granted small things like that. Sometimes, they will never happen again.

She loved me, a pure kind of love. Those are memories you want to capture, and you hold on to that memory and want to make it last forever. Here is a girl, one of the most talented and most intelligent ones that I know (and I am not just saying that because I love her) who loves me for who I am.

Today, she loves me still. We’ve been through a lot, and I bet there would be tougher times ahead. Not just about her, but about me as well; about us, and about the tough things in the life.

I guess that’s what love’s about.

I think I am actually doing Neil (like close?) a favor. I am sure that most people there are spoiled rich kids who are not real fans, a bunch of people who just participated because they can just tell people that they were there. I deserve to be there; hence, I am broke. So, I decided that I should spend some money on comic books. I have most of his books already, darn! At least Fully Booked is stocked with a selection of items I still don’t have.

I decided to buy The Tragical Comedy or Comical Tragedy of Mr. Punch, The Books of Magic and Odd and the Frost Giants (which I gave Meow in celebration of our 23rd month-sary).

I read the two earlier works as soon as I got home.

The Book of Magic, whose cover is reminiscent of Harry Potter, not really a spoof because it came out earlier than JK Rowling’s. The similarities ends with wizardry and the glasses. He is poised to be the greatest wizard of his generation. Assisted by four guys in trench coats, that includes the Phantom Stranger and John Constantine  (yes, Keannu Reeves in the movie) . He is brought to choose whether he wants science or magic, and good or evil. He travels in time to the past (right from creation, to the present where he meets the most powerful magicians in the DC universe, to Fairyland (Faerie) where Morpheus (The Sandman) has a bit role and Titania (think Queen from Midsummer Night’s Dream), and to the future (up to the part where the world ends).

It was good, not really focusing on his tutelage as a magic practitioner, but with what magic is all about. I guess I love magic too. Hehehe. This reminds me of a time while looking in Mentalism, I thought I was really gonna be taught of concentrating to read minds or bending things with the power of your mind, not thgat I think I have the persistence to pursue that. I ended up with an ebook on how to dupe people, a disappointment.

Moving on. Just thinking out loud.

Mr. Punch is a book of a different kind, not really something that I’d call fantasy or read to my kids younger than seven (or even thirteen). It is dark, it talked about death, insanity and the twisted things in life, unseen and interpreted from the eyes of a child. It is a story of one summer with a boy’s grandparents, with the Punch and Judy puppet show (apparently the puppet show did exist and takes roots from the 16th century) on the backdrop of it all. In the end, Mr. Punch for the boy represented many bad memories.

It’s at least good to know the purchases I made are worth it, I still think that the promotion was still bad. Paano naman ang mga mahihirap na fans na walang trabaho?

She had eyes like for the chinita types, but it was too big for her nose (that was very Filipino, a Filipino nose in a nice way). It is funny how we are all made to think of standards, maybe she is beautiful in some cultures. And I blame globalization.

We have talked  about beauty in length last weekend, maybe suitable for another post.

OT yesterday, OT the other day, OT pretty much everyday. I am beginning to hate this job. It is tough when you render overtime, and they don’t give you a good score for that. Imagine a call with foreign speakers¹, and you are working on something from a Pharmaceutical industry, with eight speakers you need to correctly tag with the right names (five of which were not properly introduced), verifying names of analysts, terminologies and testing terms of almost indiscernible pronunciation. Now that’s tough!

That is my life, of course, it’s not always that bad but it can be very tiresome. Deadlines to meet, re-eds to do, making sense of words, and cutting and splicing text. I am not sure how I wound up with this job.

I realized that I am quite comfortable writing just for the sake of writing, maybe I really have matured from the blogger of five years ago who would bloghop, just for them to pay me a visit. At age 27, I think that’s not that bad. Not one of the people from my blogroll back then, what I’d call the Golden Age of Blogging,  is active in the blogsphere anymore.

This post ends here.

1. I love them but it is hard to transe them

In the episode I saw, Kevin Arnold is partnered with weird girl Margaret, the unpopular type that we all have in school. He realized she’s pretty cool even if “She asks too many questions, has a pet bat, and wears her hair in three pig tails (because you never know when you’re going to need a hair tie)”¹ .

OK! He was not a role model here, but there were episodes that he was, he was more like an asshole. He usually isn’t and I hated him here (coming from the lower end of the social chain in HS), but this episode teaches us something. He wants to be secret friends with her, which hurts Margaret, and his inability to do anything haunts him.

It really affected me. Maybe because I watched The Wonder Years as a kid. Teenagers now have Miley Cyrus, Bella Swan² and Gossip Girl³ characters as role models, which is really no surprise that kids are the way they are now.

They don’t make TV shows like that anymore. Bring on the sex! So I hear those producers say.

Moving on. Tayong mga Pinoy (or sila lang), ina-idolize si Pacquiao. I ask people, do hitting people bring honor to our country? Gumanda ba ang ekonomiya, may tinulong ba yan sa buhay ng maraming tao? I still maintain that I hated TV news that dedicated 30 minutes of airtime to him, while during that time, Reynaldo Punongbayan⁴ died just about the same time in 2005. He has been offered jobs abroad but he loved this country.

And how come we don’t give credit to people like Dr. Amador  Muriel, now that’s someone we can be proud of. He has a molecular theory in “Quantum Disturbance.” Di ako physicist, but it is something to be proud of. And I am proud.

Oh well.

1. Progressive Boink
2. the Twilight girl with the very weak personality and predilection for creepy and possessive vampires and werewolves
3. TV show with promiscuous teenagers with little time to study but has a lot of time fornicationg than some twenty-something people I know
4. he was then the head of PHIVOLCS and saved thousand of lives when Mt. Pinatubo erupted with his foresight about the situation, despite the skepticism many had

I think I want to be back in the time when we are trained my a master craftsman, be a novice and work your way up until you get to be called a Master, because you have become worthy.

We work then we see a large deduction on our pay slip, ridiculously large coz the government feels we need to pay that much for being a Filipino. I am enjoying being a Filipino right now.

One reason I am scared of having children is that they will grow up in a lawless world, amoral and without conscience. It would work for me, except that most of the people here are characteristically stupid, lame and plain disgusting, just making an excuse to justify their cravings of lust and oter things I find gross.

And there’s the chance that by the time I get to have a kid, I am always at my wit’s end asking whether the world’s end is near.Not being a fanatical, like one of those people I detest, but looking at the weather todaay and man’s continuous downward spiral and tendency for self-destruction, I think it may just be near. The world’s end is near, we’ll be suffocating due to bad air or drowned by flood or die due to hypothermia or freaking heat stroke.

Spare the religious diatribe, I am not religious. I am not even religious, and here I am blabbering about the world’s end and the decadence of Man. I need to go out.

I need a vacation!

So apparently, I have not lost it yet. I thought I was beginning to be one of them.

I hate a lot of people right now. I hate Vice Ganda. I don’t know why people in facebook are all of a sudden fans of Vice Ganda, I don’t know what good she ever did? Really. All she did was made an insipid defense (actually lame rebuttal, which is not even a real rebuttal) against Rosanna Roces’ comments against teachers. FB makes me see the sick and twisted minds of people who are fans of Jason Ivler. It is not much different from worshipping Charles Manson. You sick, sick people!

I don’t like the president of the country, and I like the presidential candidates no better. What am I supposed to do?

And all the funny attacks I do against the Twilight and New Moon are ignored. Like it is so easy to find people who hate Meyer books online but in the waking, conscious world, They all LOVE Bella and Edward, especially pasty-sparkly, romanticized Edward who needs to get some therapy. I haven’t even started with Jacob. Actually, they both do and all the readers of that stupid book who does not get how twisted the relationship is! And mind you, I know what I AM TALKING ABOUT!

Wooh!

What has the world gotten to? Tell me.

Note: This post is offensive to Stephenie Meyer and her fans.

Bad-tempered at first, I then got lost in the world of fantasy and enjoyed reading about Merlyn’s wisdom, Queen Morgause of Lothian and her other enchanted sisters, of the Old Ones and the early years of Arthur’s rule.

I think life would have been less complicated without technology. You don’t need to everyday check your email or see updates from your so-called friends whose interaction with you is reduced to “lols” and “:)” in social networking websites. You find more crap on the Internet than the extensive knowledge already there.

You then toil at work, doing a job that you don’t like, to save money in anticipation of the iPad.

Then, you go to libraries to search for information, manually sorting books to find the more useful ones. I used to be very good at that in High School. I am not only good; I think I could have been an expert in it. I am not sure if I can still do that now.

Two days ago, I received a hand-written letter from Meow, a deeply emotional one. The past two months we were attacking each other nastily on email and chat. Her letter was heartfelt, and I was touched, maybe because there is more labor on writing on paper. Now we’re better, and I promised I’ll find a way to work it out.

Technology: Internet, Cable TV, cellphones take us away from other beautiful things like literature, art, from all things beautiful like the fresh air or smelling the flowers (seriously), even in the scorching heat of Manila.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate technology. I keep a blog on my own domain, but sometimes I wonder….

I once took a Facebook quiz on which literary character you are, it came out with Holden Caulfield. Nak ng –!I am not like Holden Caulfield. It killed me. Do I strike you to be the type of guy who complains a lot, and has all this angst against the world? I am not like that! Do you see me complaining that way?!

Okay.

I read The Catcherwhen, I think, I was in college. I was young but not that young that I have already a good grasp of who I am, which is probably one of the reasons that the book did not hit me as hard as others. I liked Franny and Zooey better.

It was the book that that guy who killed John Lennon was reading before the assassination.

I guess there were several things I liked about the book. It captured a part of that angry time in your youth. Also, Holden may be a consistent whiner who insult people a lot but he still does the right thing, and in the end he felt he was in that field catching those falling off the cliff. I remember the intense emotions when I was reading the book toward the end. That I still remember.

O Holden, you are a stupid smart-ass.

We will remember Mr. Salinger.

There are rumors that the elusive writer left a safe with lots of unpublished stories. I will probably wait for those if they do come out, and if indeed, there is….

I do not know if I am going to be regularized by February. I have some absences and my performance isn’t exactly what you’d call stellar.

But if I do, and if there is some sliver of hope that I am to be regularized, I need a friend. A friend that gets it, a normal friend.

Not that I hate the people I hang out with, they’re actually very nice to me. But it sure would be nice to hang out with someone, male and heterosexual, for a change.

A co-worker once said that men in our company are either gay or ugly, they then look at me and say that I am an exception in that category. Now, they have changed it. The men in our company are either gay or geeks. I think superior geeks will shudder at the nature of our jobs. But seriously, I dont see many geeks here, maybe they were all transferred in the evening shift. But it sure would be nice to hanging out with some one different.

Yesterday, I confessed to Meow that I am beginning to talk like them. She was surprised that I said Gora so casually. Hahaha! It is not wrong to speak Gay Talk but it doesn’t really suit me. I don’t want to say all those stuff in normal conversation. They are beginning to rub off on me. NOOOO!

I want a friend who likes fantasy and cartoons. Someone who smokes and drinks. Someone who have a sense of humor that is similar to mine. Someone who does not fornicate with men. Please, please, please…

My first reaction:

• Isn’t he married?
• I did not know they were dating.
• Does this end any chances of a Dresden Dolls reunion?
• They would make an awesome couple.
• Why do I care too much about celebrities that DO NOT KNOW I EVEN EXIST!

So I checked the Internet, not a good time, our ISP’s service is so SLOW last night. I learned that Gaiman was separated from his ex-wife for more than 5 years. It turns out I am not that big of a fan, anyway. Hahaha! Meow has been telling me I am beginning to be one of the stalker-type fans, but no! I did not know. I am normal after all.

I can’t sleep much last night thinking about it. So, that was creepy. I take it back, I am not normal, after all!

Checking the validity of the news, it appears to be true. Gaiman posted it in his blog and Palmer has tweet about it. This is like BIG NEWS in the geek layer of the blogsphere, geeks are abuzz about it, and they are happy. And you’d hear the type of geekiness you hear when a geek icon marries someone cool. They are inspired.

The spunky singer of the Dresden Dolls marries the the Sandman creator. What can I say about that? Really! I am out of words.